i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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