big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize