nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
