i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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