I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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