i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
