omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
