Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
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at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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