At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
