so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
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So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
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You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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