Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
