Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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