I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
