So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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