i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
