I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize