From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
only you would photoshop your dick
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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