my mouth tastes like poor choices
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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