dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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