did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
