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• (310): View more from California

  and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off

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• (239): View more from Florida

  My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.

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  27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (315): View more from New York

  So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.

  (1-419): View more from Ohio

  Um. I literally have no words.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.

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  These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover

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• (253): View more from Washington

  I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  It's definitely revenge time.

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?

  (1-289): View more from Ontario

  When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.

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