Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures

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  (818): you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures http://tfl.nu/qd8i
  Replies (14) Good night (3748) Bad night (567)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg

  (1-613): View more from Ontario

  so what did you do?

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!

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  (613): I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg (1-613): so what did you do? (613): I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash! http://tfl.nu/b0di
  Replies (23) Good night (6224) Bad night (783)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.

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  (203): that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game. http://tfl.nu/oyv6
  Replies (15) Good night (4369) Bad night (1072)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.

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  (617): i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here. http://tfl.nu/jd5o
  Replies (8) Good night (3359) Bad night (949)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases

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  (716): Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases http://tfl.nu/lpic
  Replies (14) Good night (5152) Bad night (1256)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.

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  (713): Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner. http://tfl.nu/89n9
  Replies (7) Good night (3042) Bad night (1203)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.

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  (603): He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car. http://tfl.nu/1mzx
  Replies (50) Good night (7965) Bad night (899)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts

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  (910): I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts http://tfl.nu/bmph
  Replies (14) Good night (1227) Bad night (600)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..

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  (303): That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end.. http://tfl.nu/ockn
  Replies (19) Good night (538) Bad night (1458)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.

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  (270): I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once. http://tfl.nu/lr7p
  Replies (6) Good night (721) Bad night (361)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.

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  (713): It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards. http://tfl.nu/tzzb
  Replies (6) Good night (793) Bad night (414)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?

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  (651): Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat? http://tfl.nu/25mc
  Replies (6) Good night (360) Bad night (858)
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  (631): View more from New York

  if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.

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  (631): if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story. http://tfl.nu/uwah
  Replies (2) Good night (513) Bad night (249)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake

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  (202): Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake http://tfl.nu/zcp7
  Replies (0) Good night (419) Bad night (244)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron

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  (252): I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron http://tfl.nu/wcx2
  Replies (4) Good night (682) Bad night (257)

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