So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
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