Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
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