Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Buhtt sex?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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