Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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