My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
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