Already got asked if we're dating
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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