he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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