if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
