break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
