Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Randomize
