I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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