I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
