If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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