i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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