Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
