I can tuck mytits in my pants
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
