Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
