Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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