I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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