All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
