Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
