Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
