I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
