Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
