I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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