literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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