Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
