Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
The ass gains better be worth it
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