it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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