I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
