I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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